We had a great time out with friends Friday night, it was so nice to catch up.  We went to a reasonably priced place and were able to walk home.  Here’s what shocked me.  It was still expensive.  When you have a set amount of money for the week and you use half of it to go out one night that’s going to affect the rest of the week.  Luckily, I had anticipated that and saved up at the end of last week and planned a cost-effective menu for this week.  Something I learned is that when you use a card at a restaurant the tip may show up later than the initial charge.  It’s probably safest to record how much total spent so I can subtract the entire amount.

These are things I had never really given much thought to.  In the past going out was just what we did and even though we didn’t think we were going to expensive places, it still added up fast.  Now that we pay cash for things everything feels much more real.  I know that if there isn’t any money left in the account on Wednesday whatever it is will have to wait until Friday.  It’s so simple and obvious, but that’s not how it’s been for several years now.  We always had a credit card that could be used to cover the necessary and the unnecessary.  Now that that’s no longer the case I really do appreciate things more.  I feel so much more aware of everything.

One aspect of a no spend challenge that can’t be controlled is your partner.  My husband is the best and he works a lot so I truly believe he deserves to go out to lunch and to happy hour with friends and coworkers.  That said, it’s really hard to budget around an unknown.  This is real life, and I’m just going to have to adapt.

Speaking of real life, slips happen because we’re human.  Thursday night we gave in to temptation and went out to dinner, even though we knew we were planning to go the Trail Blazers game Friday night with free tickets we got from a friend.  Ugh!  I noticed that I didn’t enjoy it as much as I thought I was going to.  I enjoyed the initial thrill of being naughty, but I had been really enjoying achieving my goals.  It’s possible that my idea of fun is changing.  I’m pretty sure I’ll never be considered a homebody or the person that wisely stops after two glasses of wine when out with friends, but maybe I’m becoming the person that only does that sometimes now.

I keep reading that in order to change your behavior you have to come up with your reason for why you want it.  My original reasons were to pay off debt and lose weight.  That’s never been enough of a motivator in the past, but I knew the direction I wanted to go.  As I was dwelling on drinking the last two evenings  and having the booze blues I realized that what I really want is less direct.  I want mental and physical health for my family.  A big part of that is drastically reducing how often we go out to eat and drink, being successful with that will bring financial health in line as well.  I truly believe that if I let overall health be my guiding motivator things will fall into place.

The biggest lesson of the week is that we’re human, but that’s no excuse to give up.  Once we went out Thursday and blew our budget for the coming week we had a choice to make, either hrow in the towel and go back to our old behaviors or get back on track and forget the past.  We chose not to give up and that feels great.

Do your thrifty best!

Lisa